Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Salving Patrician Tory Consciences

The Observer explains our manifesto well...

Marriage aside, the Tory manifesto is defined by suspicion of state intervention. Mr Cameron promises a Big Society, in which charities, businesses and volunteers tackle social problems that Labour's bureaucratic agencies have failed to solve.

But the Conservatives offer no credible route map for the transition from state funding. Mr Cameron deploys the language of civic duty to salve patrician Tory consciences over what would really be a Thatcherite assault on public sector jobs and services.

More here. It's good too see them endorse change.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I'm not scared, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!

So Mr Dome thinks I'm afraid of facing Jeremy Paxman for one of his famous forensic interviews. Well I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not! (I am saying it lots because Mr Paxman has been known to ask a question over and over again, so there.)

I'm not scared. The fact is that Mr Paxman isn't fair. He asks really difficult questions, that might make me look foolish, like George here:



He doesn't seem to understand that those of us born to rule should be shown a little more deference than that.

I think Mr Dome should say sorry for being so mean, and the rest of you should just shut up about this, OK? Or you'll be very, very, very, very, very sorry.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Wearing a non-dom

Gosh, well who'd have thought my old pal Lord Ashcroft was a non-dom. I've known for weeks of course which is why I've been defending him for years. Mike Ashcroft is one of us, after all.

Your domicile you see is defined in law as the country you feel the greatest affinity to. Clearly buying an election for the Conservatives is not something you do if you feel affinity for somewhere [are you sure this is right, Michael?].





Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Style over substance

I hope you like our new billboard campaign


(credit)

And you can see some of the ideas we had along the way here.


Monday, October 05, 2009

Half a million doctors can't be right

The conservatives will remove half a million people from incapacity benefit. They can work, you see, whatever their doctors say. We know this. We know exactly which half a million people have been misdiagnosed as incapable of working, and are in fact idle layabouts with made up illnesses and disabilities. After all disability is merely a social construct, or something.

How do we know this? How can we identify exactly which half a million people deserve to have their crutches kicked away by their betters? Well it comes from the same place as our deep conviction that we are worthy and destined to be your rulers. I may no longer be his heir, but one ex-prime minister knew just how much better a deep sense of conviction was, than evidence, when justifying what might seem reckless, but with hindsight, erm...